To be a fly on my wall...

I love trash TV. So needless to say, I have always been a fan of the Maury show. Granted that there are all of three themes that rotate through the show these days, but back when I was just a young high schooler that had all afternoon to tune in, the show had more depth... you know, like four rotating themes. I was always a fan of times when they brought in the hidden camera and saw who cheated on who, or what someone did in their free times, etc. Lately, I have been thinking that if someone put a hidden camera in my apartment, they would laugh (and question my sanity) nonstop.

Take last night for example. Two days ago, I received that dreaded electric bill and was anticipating it to have dropped significantly since I had been taking all of these precautions to lower the energy use. As I opened the bill, my jaw dropped, as I realized that my previous bill of $112 was not greater than this one, but rather was significantly less, as this bill stated that I owed $156. It took me all of ten seconds to get through the house and turn off every light and to turn off my last source of heat that I was still using. When friends came over shortly after, they complained of the cold temperatures, but honestly, I didn't care. They should have worn their parka and slippers over. The first night wasn't so bad. I wore sweats and wrapped up in a blanket and was fine (except my nose was cold). Last night, however, it had gotten much colder and I had to resort to finding warmth. No, not to worry, I didn't turn the heat, rather I decided that the best idea was to prepare for skiing instead of bed. My pajamas last night consisted of sweatpants, wool socks, an under armor shirt, a sweat shirt (with the hood up), and gloves. As blankets, I piled on my snuggie, a hospital blanket, a fleece blanket, and my comforter, with another fleece blanket rapped around my head and shoulders like a shaw. I was warm as you can possibly imagine and drifted off to sleep immediately. Of course, I wasn't able to move while I slept but that was okay with me. I can only imagine what someone would have thought had been watching me on a hidden camera and seen my outfit and cover choices last night, or more importantly if they could have seen me continue to be wrapped in it when I went to start my shower this morning.

Speaking of showers, that is another thing that I'm sure people would have once enjoyed watching as a fly on the wall, and not because I have a killer six pack of abs and flawless tan skin. No no no, it is because until about 6 months ago, I wasn't aware of the "right" way to get into a shower. I used to take off my clothes, get in the tub, close the curtain, then start the water. When it had reached the temperature that I desired, I would twist the knob so that the water would come out of the over head faucet and make a run to the other end of the shower, as not to get water on my face or get blasted by the first really cold few seconds. As it turns out, this isn't the normal way to take a shower -- guess my mother forgot to tell me that (because yes, I checked and she doesn't shower like that so it isn't like I was taught wrong). I would still be doing this crazy run into the other wall of the shower technique had I not received an e-mail to inform me differently. The e-mail, titled "random thoughts," made a comment something along the lines of "do you know that there are people that get in the shower BEFORE they turn it on?" Confused, I asked a friend what other way you would do it and they explained to me that the logical thing was to start the shower THEN get in. Since then, I have had a much less traumatic time in the shower.

My strange actions are not limited here. In fact, I would guess that I do much more bazaar things on a daily basis and just don't realize that they are weird because no one has ever pointed that out. Recently, a friend of mine asked if I was of MTV's "True Life" show, what would mine be about. Originally, we decided it might be True Life: I was promiscuous in college and now I have no friends or life (yea, a little lengthy but you have to work with what you have). Now, however, I feel fairly certain that it should be True Life: I am a complete weirdo and don't even realize it.